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Episode 509 – It’s a Sobriety Problem
Today we have Nicole. She is 46 years old from Fairfax, VA. She took her last drink on May 18th, 2023.
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[03:32] Thoughts from Paul:
Paul is always saving lines or notes that he would like to use in future podcasts. Today he reads a bunch of those that haven’t quite found a home yet. This includes random stats, some of the consequences of drinking, how alcohol affects us, and that connection is an important component in our lives regardless of addiction status.
[09:02] Paul introduces Nicole:
Nicole lives in northern Virginia with her partner. They have three cats, one dog and three horses. Nicole and her partner both participate in dressage and eventing. She enjoys running marathons.
Nicole says she did not start drinking when she was young. When she was in her late teens she started a 12 year long modeling career. Due to the weight restrictions around her modeling contract, she says she could not afford the calories from alcohol.
Her drinking began when she was in grad school in her 30s. She began casually drinking with some friends and was always a little leery of alcohol with an unexplainable concern that she might develop a problem but ignored it. COVID definitely had an impact on her. Around that time, she was also going through a divorce and her father had developed some chronic health issues.
Nicole feels she had control of her drinking for five to seven years and reflects that it’s like you have control of it until you don’t. She says she wasn’t the type to drink to excess which allowed her to compare herself to others and believed she didn’t have a problem. Ignoring the red flags in her drinking habits, it was when Nicole caught herself shaking while trying to sign in to a work conference that she realized she was having consequences. Because she minored in addiction studies, she feels that knowledge pushed her to observe herself and her drinking.
Nicole decided to try to cut back on her drinking like she did with smoking. She was not able to successfully do it. She was beginning to realize she had to drink even when she didn’t want to. Nicole started looking into outpatient rehab and no one would take her because she was having shakes. She reluctantly went to inpatient rehab with the plan of staying for one week. Nicole ended up doing the full 30 days after realizing she could not do this alone. She uses Vivitrol (Naltrexone) and is a proponent of medical treatment for addictions.
Nicole didn’t do AA having a hard time wrapping her ideas around it. She chose therapy and SMART recovery. Her background in science has helped her understand possible triggers. She finds having a plan very important to avoid boredom, which she learned is a trigger for her. Nicole feels that the intensity of the coping mechanism needs to match the intensity of the craving.
Nicole’s parting piece of guidance: you are not alone, be pro-choice in your recovery, try to trust yourself a little bit.
[00:00] Outro:
If there is a question that you would like to have Paul answer on the air of the RE podcast, record a voice memo and email it to info@recoveryelevator.com. We will select a coup for Paul to answer on the air.
Recovery Elevator
We took the elevator down; we got to take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
