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Amanda, with 19 months since her last drink, shares her story
Why we drink:
- Alcohol is everywhere. Drinking appears to be the norm. We are bombarded with alcohol advertisements 67 times a day. Our society has a love affair with booze.
- We have a genetic make-up to become addicted to alcohol.
- Our environment is flooded with alcohol. We think everything we do should be accompanied by alcohol.
- Alcohol is a highly addicted drug.
- We have shitty coping skills.
Not on the list of why we drink: a moral failing or a weakness of character
SHOW NOTES
[ 7:45 ] Paul Introduces Amanda. How long have you been sober?
Amanda – I have been sober for 19 months. This is the longest I have ever been sober. I feel very proud of myself.
[ 8:51 ] What is your background?
Amanda – I am from Mississippi but now live in Florida with my 15 year old daughter.
[ 10:27 ] Did you ever try to put rules in place to moderate your drinking?
Amanda – I started drinking when I was 16 so there were no rules in the beginning. I was that sloppy drunk girl in the room. I would start watching the clock for 5:00 which meant it was time to drink.
[ 12:34 ] When did you first realize that you had a problem?
Amanda – In 2010, one bad thing after another happened to me. I was put in jail for domestic violence. I was so ashamed of not being able to control myself with alcohol. I felt that I was a strong person since I had raised my daughter alone. I did not want to appear weak and vulnerable.
[ 14:26 ] Amanda and Paul discuss the stigma of addiction.
Amanda – I had twin cousins who died because of alcohol. Their memory and my daughter were the only reasons why I didn’t commit suicide myself. I felt like no one cared about me so why should I care about myself?
[ 16:01 ] How did you get sober?
Amanda – I did not use AA. I went to a rehab that taught the 12 steps but after I was released, there was no support. No one called or checked on me. My parents had basically just dropped me off at rehab. I still drank for 4 years and then turned to meth. I finally decided that I was either going to die or go back to jail. I moved to another state but was still hanging out with the same type of people. I knew I needed to give up booze so I started looking for something else to do. This led me to find a group of people who were into mud runs. I got into fitness.
[ 21:42 ] Amanda and Paul discuss her days in rehab and her personal development.
Amanda – I did not feel like anything had changed after my 60 days in rehab. Afterward I started looking into motivational development. Someone told me that I was born with a purpose. Everyone has the power to help others. I was under the false assumption that life was going to be a piece of cake. I joined a personal development community (Breather University). The people in this group accepted me and my life has completely changed. I am Amanda and I am amazing! I am not a part of sobriety groups because I hate the alcoholic label. What you say about yourself is what you are.
[ 33:36 ] What is your pump up song?
Paul – Limp Bizkit, “Nookie” (Life is an opportunity, not an obligation).
Amanda – Jason Aldean, “Gonna Know We Were Here” (Self-affirmations are super important to me).
[ 34:08 ] What is your relationship like with your daughter?
Amanda – We have had to rebuild our relationship. She lived with my parents for the last 6 months that I was using. She moved in with me when I went to Florida. There has been a lot of growing and we have had to push through the hard times.
[ 36:50 ] What is a typical day like for you?
Amanda – I say positive affirmations to myself every day. I list 3 things that I am grateful for every day. I try to exercise, read or watch personal development videos every day.
[ 39:09 ] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking? getting knocked out by a big guy I had tried to beat up
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment? jail
- What’s your plan moving forward? sharing my story to give others hope
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)? everything that you go through, isn’t always about you
- What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking? life is beautiful, fill your void with goodness
- You might be an alcoholic if….. you duct tape 2 beers to your hands so that you do not lose them
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code Elevator for your first month free
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
Amanda U-Tube videos – Patched Wangs
Book “Beyond the Influence,” by Katherine Ketcham
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”