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Episode 510 – Alcohol Policy
Today we have Kevin. He is 42 years old, from Fresno, CA and is celebrating 500 days at the time of this recording.
Sponsors for this episode:
Better Help – code ELEVATOR for 10% off of your first month
AG1 – free gift with your first subscriptions, in addition to their Welcome Kit.
Restore – registration opens Monday December 2nd. This is Recovery Elevator’s most intensive AF course for someone looking for extra accountability for Dry January.
[03:34] Thoughts from Paul:
Happy Thanksgiving Week! Life is not perfect but there is so much to be thankful about. Paul shares that when a sponsor first challenged him to write down five things he was grateful for each day, he could not do it. Nowadays he recognizes so much to be thankful for.
This entire week is all about gratitude and giving thanks. This is a tradition in our modern culture that tells us to come together as a family and give thanks. Plus, there’s pumpkin pie.
A tip to help you stay sober this Thursday and throughout the week: create accountability, AKA, Burn the Ships. It doesn’t have to be with everyone in your family, but at least somebody who isn’t your dog has to know you won’t be drinking. And don’t forget to bring your own drink of choice to any gathering you attend.
[08:32] Paul introduces Kevin:
Kevin is 42 and lives in the Fresno area. He owns and operates a commercial landscape business. He is married and has one daughter in college and a son in third grade. For fun, he enjoys nature, reading, CrossFit, playing golf and coaching his son’s sports teams.
Kevin says he first drank in high school, and it was the typical weekends and parties, but nothing too dramatic. In college it turned into regular Thursday through Saturday thing. He equated drinking with a good time and doesn’t really have many regrets.
Right before Kevin’s senior year of college, he found out his long-time girlfriend was pregnant. They ended up getting married and Kevin went on to finish college. Shortly after his daughter was born, he completed college, and his wife and daughter moved in with him.
Drinking became a reward for him and happy hours were commonplace. At one point he recalls telling a coworker he needed to quit drinking during the week. This was his first thought about moderating. He says it didn’t stick.
Kevin’s wife was his drinking partner and when she decided to quit for health reasons, Kevin opted to continue. Over time, it strained their relationship, and she would ask him to cut back and moderate. Kevin would try, but it wouldn’t last long. He started to realize it was a problem when he was concealing some of his drinks so that she wouldn’t know how much he had.
After discovering the RE podcast, Kevin didn’t initially hear anyone he identified with. Once he did, however, he realized that he was not alone with the issues he was having.
He knew he had to quit but wasn’t sure when. Kevin didn’t think AA would be for him. He eventually went to some meetings and would get a little time away from alcohol but would go right back to it mainly in isolation. The cycle continued for a while.
Now with 500 days, Kevin reflects that initially focused on how he could get to 200 days instead of the day in front of him. He had to really embrace AA in order to change his thinking. Taking things one day at a time and being present has become important to Kevin. Acknowledging and moving past some resentments was very helpful for him.
Since ditching the booze, Kevin says that he is able to deal with whatever happens in life without the need to numb. He has a lot less anxiety and stress about things and has more confidence that alcohol will not fix things for him.
Kevin’s parting piece of guidance: don’t quit quitting.
Recovery Elevator
We took the elevator down; we got to take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
I love you guys.
