by Paul Churchill | Dec 5, 2018 | Blog, Expectations
I’ve been wanting to write this post for quite some time, and I’m excited to have finally done so. A cure to addiction… Is this even possible? Before we explore this, let’s take a snapshot of what addiction is right now. At this moment in time, 2018, I feel we are at the beginning of what our understanding of what addiction even is, let alone finding a treatment for it. Are we close to a cure at this moment? Unfortunately, I don’t think so, in fact, I don’t believe we are even close. With 83 years passing since the inception of AA in 1935, we still don’t know much about what causes addiction and how to treat it; especially modern science. In 2014, there were 143 med schools in the USA, and only 14 of them had 1 class on addiction even though it’s estimated that 40% of hospital beds are occupied due to alcohol-related issues. This is staggering. It can be said that rehab is a 30+ thousand-dollar introduction to 12 step programs, and the best study that I can find is that AA has a 7-8% success rate according to the Sober Truth by Lance Dodes. Currently, 85% of rehab facilities are 12 step based. Studies show that 2.5 people out of 1000 make it to 2 years of sobriety. Yikes, but the good news is you can continuously start over. Governments have no idea how to deal with addiction. The 40 years, 1 trillion-dollar war on drugs has primarily been a waste. There are still 21 million Americans, 80% of those with alcohol use disorders, who need treatment with addiction. Estimates show that of these 21 million Americans, only 10% of those get the actual help they need. I don’t want to paint a grim picture for readers, but currently, on this planet, we aren’t doing so hot when it comes to treating addiction. In fact, we’re failing, but it’s a start.
Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob created a fantastic program called Alcoholics Anonymous that currently has over 2 million members in over 120,000 groups worldwide. There is Smart Recovery, Refuge Recovery, yoga, meditation, Recovery Elevator and more. People are trying their hardest to tackle this planet’s most pressing epidemic; addiction. Despite the bleak snapshot painted above, I feel we are on the right track. I think in 500 years when we look back, we will all be looked at as pioneers for what shaped the way for recovery treatment. Or what we’re doing now may be like bloodletting. Doctors thought for around 800 years that bloodletting was the best way to rid the body of an infectious disease. Turns out, human beings need blood. I don’t think this is the case with how we are currently treating addiction, but you never know.
Let’s discuss what I mean when I say cure to addiction. What I’m proposing should render addiction obsolete. As in it won’t happen, or least not nearly at the level of occurrence that we see today. I guess this wouldn’t really be a cure, because to have a cure, you would need a disease, and what I’ll be covering should essentially create an environment that doesn’t foster the disease. Too much of western medicine emphasizes treating existing illnesses since there isn’t much money to be made in getting at the source. When I say cure to addiction, I don’t mean addiction happens, then insert treatment. I’m saying, addiction doesn’t happen in the first place. This is the more ideal scenario. I’d be more than happy to be out of a job.
Keep in mind, this is all speculative, some of these ideas may seem so far out, so bizarre that it isn’t even a possibility… But if you give it some thought, this may make sense. Some of you will agree with this, some of you might not want what I’m proposing ever to happen. In fact, it scares me too. It’s uncomfortable. Who knows, if MP3’s are still a thing in 500 years, I may get this spot on, or I may have wildly missed the mark.
Where did I get the idea for this post? For the cure to addiction? Well, it was at my fantasy football draft in Las Vegas this past August. We were having dinner at the Hofbrauhaus House, and I was watching my two buddies argue about the dividing topic of immigration. One of them is a liberal, and the other is a conservative. They’ve had this same conversation or a similar one, the past 5 drafts. I knew I wouldn’t be engaging in this conversation, so I decided just to sit, listen and observe. As they were defending their steadfast positions with eloquent and non-eloquent diatribes based on part fact but mostly conviction, a strange thought arrived. It said the only way to solve the immigration issue is to eliminate all borders. Across the whole planet. And before we go any further, I want to mention, this post is about addiction, not immigration or politics, so please do your best to listen with an open mind. I said to myself, no, that can’t be right. That will never happen. And then the wheels in mind started moving. So much so, that I had to step outside the restaurant and sit on a bench for about 10 minutes. My brain kept connecting the dots until I said, holy shit. That’s the cure to addiction. Yippee!!
You might be saying to yourself episode 199 ended with you thanking planet earth, now you’re talking about a world with no borders. Wow, Paul, I bet you’re wearing Birkenstocks and have distanced yourself from all forms of plastic. Nope, I’m a guy who lives in Montana, a red state, who shoots clays with my shotgun for fun on the weekend, but deep down, even though some of it doesn’t sit well with me either, it feels right.
Okay, let’s explore this. In my opinion, the most profound line in “The Realm of Hungry Ghosts” by Dr. Gabor Mate, is that anthropologists have no record of addiction in pre-modern times. Contrary to popular belief, Europeans did not bring alcohol to the Native American, Inuit, and Aboriginal populations, or to South America to the Mayans, Incas or Aztecs. Alcohol has been around for 1,000’s of years and records show that all these cultures consumed alcohol. So why is that only within the past 400-500 years has abuse of alcohol and addiction been a problem. Why has is the swath of addiction caused more havoc within some social groups more than others? Before we discuss this, let’s look at the Rat Park experiment conducted by Bruce Alexander.
I first came across this study in my first year of podcasting, and I’m reluctant to say, I dismissed it. At that time, I was in the camp that addiction is roughly 80% genetics and about 20% environmental, now, I’ve done somewhat of 180. I feel that addiction is about 20% genetics and 80% environmental. Okay, back to Rat Park. The study looks at two different environments for rats. In one cage, it had a single rat. The rat has access to food, water, and cocaine. It was only a matter of time before the lone rat chose a diet of strict cocaine and ended up dying. This process was repeated continuously with the same result. You might say, duh, cocaine is one of the top 4 most addictive drugs on the planet. But what happens when the environment changes. The second environment is called Rat Park which is full of rat families, with toys for the rats to play with, with mates for the rats, and probably Third Eye Blind Playing in the background. In Rat Park, the rats have access to food, water, and an unlimited supply of cocaine. What happened? Nothing. Cocaine/addiction was no longer a problem. Eliminate stress, change the environment, and eliminate addiction. It worked for rats, it should for us right? Well not so simple, but in theory, yes, and it’s gonna take some time. Johan Hari talks about this in his Ted Talk titled, “The Opposite of Addiction is Connection.” I highly recommend watching this. He continues to say the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety. It’s connection. I would say it’s more of a combo of sobriety and connection.
I am also reluctant to say when I first saw Johan Hari’s Ted Talk 3 years ago, I dismissed it and wasn’t a big fan. Now, I think I think, for the most part, it’s spot on. Johan’s Ted talk is starting to echo a theme that has been presenting itself the more I learn about alcoholism and addiction. That addiction is not about the pleasurable effects of substances, it’s about the user’s inability to connect in healthy ways with other human beings. In other words, addiction is not a substance disorder, it’s a social disorder. Previously, when I first started the Recovery Elevator podcast, early 2015, I was in the camp that the pleasurable effects of alcohol, and drugs, were the primary drivers for addiction but now I feel that the pleasurable effects of alcohol and drugs help soothe inner trauma and our inabilities to connect healthily with other humans. On an individual level, we are not at fault for this. In today’s breakneck fast-paced world, we are living further and further away from other human beings, we falsely connect more and more via social media and our society has a significant problem with accumulating external possessions because we’re taught this is healthy. Unfortunately, much of today’s economy is reliant upon our addictions.
I feel the birth of addiction occurred with the mass displacement of people from their lands, communities, and roots that started with the substantial land grabs of the Spanish, French, Dutch, English, and Americans on our own continent. Some groups of people, who are disproportionately affected by addiction, got the raw end of the stick, and they are still paying the price. What about those who weren’t displaced from their lands, maybe someone like myself and probably several other listeners. Well, life has drastically changed for everyone on the face of the planet in the past 500 years, Especially in the previous 100, and even more so in the past 50. Before the first flight took place in 1902, it was a lot harder to leave a community. Today, I think a lot of us are still trying to figure out “where we belong” and this sense of alienation has affected some more than others. For myself, this has resulted in addiction.
Back to the absence of addiction in pre-modern times. You might be saying to yourself, Paul, I’m relatively certain borders, boundaries, tribe lines, restrictions, precincts, confines, rivers existed in pre-modern times… Yes, this is correct. But when civilizations remained settled for upwards of 500-1,000+ years, and you were lucky to have oxen and wagon, you may have never encountered a border or really knew what one was in your lifetime. If everything you needed was already in your own “rat park,” then why leave?
Now let’s explore a futuristic world without borders. Again, this scares me. Big time, but if you think about it, it’s really the only way things can go. We’ve been doing the conquer, defeat, divide, overthrow, coup, rebellion, revolution, wage war, WWI, WWII, with sticks and clubs and now with nuclear bombs. For ages. It’s not working, and human beings are starting to wizen up. The EU opened its borders up in 1985, and this has made things easier.
When will this no border fantasy world occur? I don’t know, it might not. Artificial Intelligence might have something to say about it first. With the proliferation of social media, which isn’t a genuine human connection, things may get a lot worse before they get better. But barring nuclear war, ending everything for everyone, I think this will happen in the next 300-500 years. If you’re saying to yourself, I don’t want to live next to a white person, or I don’t want to live next to a black person, well, in the next 200 years, we’re all going to be the same color anyways so please get over yourself. I think, when everyone can move about this planet freely, when we can accept all human beings as equal when we are able to establish roots and communities wherever we’d like, then I think we’ll wake up one day and see the problem of addiction slowly fade away.
by Paul Churchill | Nov 19, 2018 | Podcast
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Dan, who doesn’t practice abstinence based recovery, shares his story…
Link to the Fox News article mentioned in the episode
“To be human is also to suffer from addiction. The particular vices vary as do our degree of addiction to them, but it takes precious little searching to know we’ve all got something unhealthy that pulls at us.” – Mike Kerrigan, Fox News
SHOW NOTES
[11:08] Paul Introduces Dan.
Paul doesn’t practice abstinence based recovery, and had a drink a few weeks ago. He’s 28 years old and lives in New York City. He runs a channel called Recovery X and Spooky Digital. He does MMA. He has a family. He practices mindfulness.
[12:48] Give us a little background about your drinking.
He started drinking when he was 10. His brother was getting married, and his parents allowed him to have a couple drinks. He got really drunk. He got a lot of attention and had a lot of fun. His family started to warn him about alcoholism but he didn’t yet understand. He would occasionally steal his father’s prescription medicine. He had behavioral problems at a young age.. he would get in fights. He started a school riot between different grades. He always looked up to the trouble makers. They got attention. He has a big family, and he felt like he always had to fight to be noticed. He was kicked out of 8th grade for stealing money from another kid. He was sent to a private boarding school. He was kicked out for fighting. He went through all kinds of behavioral modification programs. He felt abandoned by his family. He noticed that his brother had a different strategy than him.
[18:33] At what point did you realize that you were using alcohol to self-soothe?
He wanted to keep getting kicked out of private schools until his parents would run out of options and send him to public school. He began to drink more once he got to high school. It helped him reduce his anxiety. He ended up getting arrested after a fight, and was sent to rehab in Los Angeles. It was his first experience with a sober lifestyle. He was 16. He saw young people in recovery. He stayed out there for a while and would go on and off about wanting to be clean. He was arrested after a drinking related incident that turned violent. Alcohol always lead to destruction in his life. He had a problem with his thoughts and feelings and emotions. He also had an inability to deal with stress and relationships.
[23:53] Tell us more about the thinking problem.
His experience has been that the drugs and alcohol have been the solution to the problem, which was thinking or avoiding his internal dialogue. He experienced a lot of internal conflict, different conflicting voices. Now he has to be really strict about what he thinks, and what he allows to come into his mind. He had to learn how to challenge and to reframe every negative thought and to turn it into something positive.
[26:17] At what point were you able to detach from the negative thoughts?
He doesn’t differentiate the thoughts from himself, he thinks it’s all him. He thinks the mind is only about 10% of the entire brain, but it thinks that it’s all of it. “It’s like a stowaway on a ship saying it’s the captain”. He had to make friends to his subconscious mind and tell it that he’s listening. He started meditating regularly. It helps him get better at reframing thoughts.
[30:17] Did you experience a rock bottom moment to push into sobriety?
Many. So many times in so many different ways. If he had to pick one it would when he was getting violent in a relationship with a woman. He realized he wasn’t raised that way and that he violated some sort of a core value about respecting women. It made a tear in his psyche and he felt something growing through the cracks.
[32:32] Tell us about the lack of abstinence in your practice. How does one successfully embrace the grey area?
He finds binary thinking in the recovery community. The more we can be inclusive and the more we can embrace the idea the abstinence based recovery isn’t the only way the more people we can reach and the more people we can help. A big misconception about harm reduction is that one needs to be completely sober. Abstinence is a goal, but we’re really looking to improve our health and our lives on a daily basis. The goal has been to monitor his mental health on a daily basis. He started doing DBT (see links below). Part of that is keeping a record of your emotions and thoughts throughout the day. He takes notes about what happens in the day. Our memories are often distorted and the diary helps eliminate that and keep everything straight. He can see the patterns that lead to substance abuse.
[36:41] When you drank recently, how did you feel when you woke up the next day?
Alcohol can beat you up, but you don’t have to do it yourself. Have compassion and keep it moving. Don’t get stuck in the self loathing. Tell yourself positive things.
[38:47] Tell us more about DBT.
DBT stands for Dialectical behavior therapy. It’s a therapy with mindfulness at its core. If one is more mindful of one’s thoughts, one can see the patterns and opportunities for reframing. If someone ahead of you shuts a door in your face, the first reaction might be anger, but if we can see that we are assuming the intent, we can reframe it as a more innocent situation.
[41:05] Talk to us about abstinence being the goal.
Abstinence is one of the goals. The real measure of success is in your life. How are you treating other people? Are you being kind and helpful? How are you feeling?
[43:03] Tell us more about Recovery X.
They are offering free recovery resources to people in need. They offer as many voices involved as possible. They help people find recovery resources in their area. Initially his passion in life was communication. When he was a child he was bad at it. He always wanted to understand communication. After being in recovery, he realized that he could combine communication and recovery to be the most use to people in the world. They want to provide trusted sources and resources that are are not scams. Real authentic honest trustworthy programs.
[48:55] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking?
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment?
- What’s your plan moving forward?Focus on mastery, and continue to stay out of the results and just hone the skills.
- What’s your favorite resource in recovery?Recovery Elevator, and RecoveryX.org
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)?Have compassion for yourself and just keep showing up and doing the work and you’ll get there.
- What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking?Love yourself like you would love somebody else and reach out to people when you need help. If you’re on Day 1 today, I would say have compassion for yourself.. you are fighting something that isn’t easy (it isn’t supposed to be) and I encourage you to keep at it. Don’t give up. It gets better, it’s a skill.
- You might be an alcoholic if…“…you go somewhere on vacation and end up on probation.”
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Recovery X:
Website
Video
Facebook (where we shoot live)
Youtube
Audio
Spotify
iTunes
Additional links mentioned from Dan
Recovery X Facebook Group where they post behind the scenes footage and people interested in recovery can connect with others.
Learn DBT Group on Facebook is a free community Dan runs, where people in recovery from a variety of mental health disorders can come to learn about DBT, get support and find free resources.
Personal Social Media for interviewee Dan
website, Instagram, or Facebook.
This episode is brought to you in support by Robinhood. Right now, Robinhood is giving my listeners free stock such as Apple, Ford or Sprint to help build your portfolio. Signup at elevator.robinhood.com
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”
by Paul Churchill | Oct 8, 2018 | Podcast
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Jamie, with 93 days since her last drink, shares her story…
“No amount of alcohol is safe for your overall health.”
“Alcohol was the leading risk factor for disease and premature death in men and women between the ages of 15 and 49 worldwide in 2016, accounting for nearly one in 10 deaths, according to the study…”
A recent article released by CNN presents scientific studies that show the negative effects of alcohol consumption on one’s overall health.. delivering an opinion contrary to the largely pro-alcohol messages one typically finds in mainstream media.
SHOW NOTES
[9:15] Paul Introduces Jamie.
Jamie is 39, from Alberta, Canada, and has been sober for 93 days. She works in the school system and teaches fitness. She is single, with two boys and dogs and cats.
[10:51] Give is a bit of background on your drinking.
She started drinking when she was 12 years old. She wanted to fit in with the bad kids. Once she became old enough she drank much more. She got married and had a child. She lost her husband in a car accident, and her drinking increased. During her idle time she would drink heavily. She met someone who drank like she did. Her social circles also drank heavily. When she had large stretches of idle time she would drink a lot. One particular summer was extra heavy.
[16:55] Did you experience a rock bottom moment?
Her social circle was large, so there was always someone to drink with if she needed a new drinking buddy. She kept saying yes to drinks with people. She would get wasted 3, 4, 5 days in a row. She began to track her drinking on her calendar. She realized she was only drinking and recovering. She tried to join a fitness program but only lasted two weeks. She got another two weeks free and she drank the whole time. She tried dry January but only lasted 23 days. She began to moderate by saying no beer. She booked a vacation, and got blackout drunk the first night. She drank the entire trip and cried the whole way home. She tried the fitness program again. She tried dry January, in which she tried to quit smoking, drinking, and begin a healthy diet at the same time. She began bullet journaling. She went to see Tony Robbins. She created a program to keep herself in check, then she would binge on the weekends. She had a horrific morning after a night of binge drinking. She met a sober mom, and immediately didn’t want to hang out with her. She called her and she recommended a counselor. She went to see an addiction counselor. She didn’t want to stop drinking. He mentioned the word “alcoholic” and she denied it. She went to her first meeting and she had a breakthrough.
[33:25] How did you quit?
She went to her first meeting, and it was full of influential AA people. Lots of milestones, and she figured out she belonged there. She experienced a myriad of emotions. She knew that her life was going to change forever.
[34:58] What happened after that meeting?
She was embarrassed about going to the meeting. She realized her girlfriend was an addiction counselor. She found the strength to go. She discovered she was battling a brain disorder and that it wasn’t her fault. She still battled the stigma of being labeled an alcoholic.
[39:27] Did you have cravings?
She was ready. She finally wanted to be good to herself. She was done hurting other people, and herself. She wanted to be there for her children, but she wasn’t really there for herself. She knew that if she didn’t deal with it, she would have been dead within 5 years.
[42:28] What’s working for you? How are you staying sober?
She listens to the podcast. She is now choosing to user her free time to work on herself. She’s established her community. She has a big list of phone numbers for support. She’s told all of her friends. She can call her sponsor about anything. She leans on her sponsor quite a bit. She didn’t give herself a choice. She “gave it all away”. It’s been working wonders.
[45:45] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking?
The anxiety the morning after, or waking up in the middle of the night in a panic. Not being comfortable in her own skin. Setting herself back.
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment?
When her friends asked her to go out and she needed to drink a case of beer. She lied to her friends.
- What’s your plan moving forward?To be kind to herself. To remember how far she’s come. To stay connected. To develop her relationship with her higher power. To work her program wholly.
- What’s your favorite resource in recovery?
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)?
That it isn’t a moral defect. It’s not her fault. To get out of her head. To eat the ice cream, it’s ok.
- What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking?
Sobriety is awesome. You’re not missing out on anything. You’re gaining! The sponsor, the accountability, the community has been number 1.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
“…if you bring six pack when you walk your dog. Every time he pees, you have a drink.”
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Support for today’s episode is brought to you by RXBAR. Visit Rxbar.com/elevator/ and enter the promo code elevator at checkout for 25% off your first order.
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”
by Paul Churchill | Sep 24, 2018 | Podcast
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe to the Recovery Elevator Podcast Apple Podcasts | | More
Tamara, with 88 days since her last drink, shares her story…
“There is only one line we can cross that we can’t come back from”
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline – 1-800-273-8255
SHOW NOTES
[4:20] Paul Introduces Tamara, and she recaps her experience with relapse and suicidal thoughts.
Tamara had a relapse after 48 days of sobriety. She just moved to a new apartment. She started the day running errands, then had a conversation with her sponsor. She was alone, felt lonely and bought vodka. She started to drink by herself. She felt guilty because she is aware of the support structures that are in place, but she still witnessed herself resorting to alcohol to try to soothe her emotional pain. She thought she had exhausted all of her options. She began to have suicidal thoughts. She recorded a goodbye message to her family. She cut her wrist and sent the message. Her parents received it and tracked her down. They got in tough with her roommate. Her roommate and her mother stopped her bleeding. She went to the ER, and a mental hospital. She realized she didn’t want to die, and that she had to change something. She found a treatment center. She stayed there for 4 weeks. Reliving it, she is reminded that she isn’t broken. She realizes how powerful alcohol is and it will take you if you let it. She didn’t know what she was living for. In the treatment center, she worked through her life experience. She didn’t consider herself a trauma victim, but then realized that she had just been ignoring some things from her past. Her pride crumbled. She was able to see just how loved she was. She was able to see the role of God in her life. She finally saw her love and worth. She felt like she came out of hiding. She doesn’t have to hide parts of herself that she struggles with. There are people in her life that accept her exactly as she is. She had to rebuild her self-image and identity. She wants to come out of her shell and live her life out in the open. She didn’t know who she was anymore. The emotional rawness from her experience enabled her to open. She realized that she is not the orchestrator of everything in her life and that there are parts of her life that she can not control. She began to focus on the present moment and not worry beyond that.
[29:45] Talk to us about the letter you received from your employer right before you left.
She had been feeling a bit out of place at her job. She took on and internalized expectations and pressure. She was open to changing everything else but she wanted to try and apply herself at her job. She received a package from her employer, and it turned out to be a letter of termination. She felt hurt. She cried but realized that she had to rebuild completely from scratch and feels like it was a gift from god.
[36:30] Tell us about what you found that can never be taken away.
She realized that no matter what is happening around her, it doesn’t have to wreck her world internally. She’s still standing, and losing her job is now empowering. She has an opportunity to rebuild her life in a way that is more authentic and meaningful to her. She wants to do the next right thing. She built her life around things that are true to her. She realized that she’s had it the entire time. She realized that she’s been loved the entire time. She feels God’s love now. She believes that we all have a purpose. She saw something in the people around her and she felt like she didn’t have it, or couldn’t grab it. After treatment, she feels more in touch with it.
[39:19] Am I right in saying that you had a full spiritual awakening?
Yes. Giving herself and life over to God has been the most liberating experience. She has faith that after the first step, the next step will present itself.
[40:53] Does one have to be religious to be spiritual?
Not at all. It’s all about one’s own personal relationship with God. Previously she felt that God’s love was punitive and based on how good or bad she had been. She was trying to achieve her way into earning love. Religion is an outward expression of the internal spiritual relationship. Religion is a practice. She loves encouraging people, cooking for people, and sharing what she’s been through. What’s changed is her feeling of spirituality.
[44:00] What advice would you have for someone that’s struggling?
It starts with openness. She thought she was open, but she was frustrated. Look at the people in your life who have something that you think you want or need. Be open to hearing what they’re doing and what they’ve been through. Humble yourself enough to be open to the idea that things are bigger than you. Be open to exploring those ideas. We’re all bonded by the desire to be loved. Tunnel vision leads to the path of pain in addiction. Open your mind to the fact that you may not see the whole picture. It’s not your fault if you can’t, but at least be open to the possibility of more.
[46:44] With 88 days in sobriety, what’s next for you?
She has no idea what’s next and that’s ok. She has some short term plans. She will continue to embrace her spirituality and be excited about her future.
[47:25] Is there anything else you’d like to add?
She believes that people are the best thing about God’s creation. If you are struggling, reach out to people. Some not conversations may not take you to anywhere but listen to people. Ask the meaningful questions and don’t fear judgement.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”
by Paul Churchill | Aug 27, 2018 | Podcast
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe to the Recovery Elevator Podcast Apple Podcasts | | More
Paul, with 28 days since his last drink, shares his story…
The article mentioned in the episode introduction: Science Increasingly Makes the Case for God
SHOW NOTES
[10:57] Paul Introduces… Paul.
Paul is from St. Paul, Minnessota. He’s 67 years old, retired. He is married with 2 kids, and 2 grandchildren. He hosts an internet radio show. He enjoys cooking and films.
[13:18] Describe your drinking history.
In his 20s, he feels that he was a normal drinker. Sometimes to excess with a bad hangover, but usually a moderate amount. During his first marriage, his wife didn’t drink as much. He started to experiment with stronger mixed drinks. His second wife died of breast cancer, and he was a caretaker for her. He used drinking to deal with the pain. He married again a third time and didn’t feel compelled to drink too much. It started to creep back in. His office culture encouraged drinking after work. He gradually switched from beer to whiskey. He tried to moderate but not drinking during the day. He began concealing his drinking from his wife. He’s tried to quit a few times in the past few years. His habits got progressively worse.
[19:10] What was different about this last attempt to quit?
After a doctor’s appointment, he was shocked at his high blood pressure. He kept drinking. He started to suffer from diabetes. His doctor said it was okay to drink a little bit each day. He used that as an excuse to ramp back up. He had quit before with determination, but this time it felt different. He is exploring the painful periods of his past, and trying to find out the connection to his drinking. He thinks it has something to do with being verbally abused as a child. The alcohol has helped him relax. He thinks his anxiety is wearing off gradually.
[28:00] Describe your present relationship with anxiety.
He feels as if something bad is going to happen, irrationally. He feels an unease, an inability to relax. A few months ago, he was going to go on a trip to Ireland. He had a lot of anxiety about the trip and it worried him. He just started drinking again to manage the anxiety.
[32:10] How did you achieve 28 days this time around?
He did some research. He found an article by Roger Ebert about his struggle. He did more research and found Cafe RE. He’s learning new ways to deal with his emotions that don’t involve drinking.
[34:53] What’s on your bucket list in sobriety?
He would like to travel. He wants to learn how to ride horses. He wants to take some guitar lessons. He wants to put more work into his radio show. He plays vintage and eclectic music.
[38:32] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking?
He was surprised to have blackouts. He found it unsettling and scary.
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment?
His wife mentioned something he said and he didn’t remember saying it.
- What’s your plan moving forward?He wants to follow up with smart recovery and AA. He will continue to journal. Continue to engage with Cafe RE.
- What’s your favorite resource in recovery?
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)?
“Today is the best day to quit.”
- What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking?
Share it with someone. Make yourself accountable. He shared with his wife and his kids and it’s made a difference. Be kind to yourself. Don’t believe what other people tell you about yourself unless it’s good.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
“..if you’re researching whether or not you’re and alcoholic.”
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Science increasingly makes the case for God – An article in the Wall Street Journal
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code Elevator for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”
